


boyfriendly

by ivermectin



Category: High School Musical (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon diverges post HSM2, Coming Out, Discussion of Racism, Eating Disorder (Mentioned), Friends to Lovers, Gay Ryan Evans, Getting Together, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mentions of past homophobia, Mutual Pining, POV Alternating, Ryan Evans is Good at Sports, Texting, Theatre stuff, Trauma, a little bit, bowling, just in secret (as you do), past chad/taylor, references to Siken, specific content warnings in beginning of chapter notes for every chapter, the word queer used for self-identification
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-18
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:22:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26530588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivermectin/pseuds/ivermectin
Summary: In which Ryan is used to being alone, sad, and a little disbelieving and Chad is full of so much love he doesn't know what to do with it. Including, but not limited to: tooth rotting levels of fluff, internal monologues, Taylor McKessie being an incredible friend, gay poetry, and discussions of serious topics. And, of course, romantic love.
Relationships: Chad Danforth & Taylor McKessie, Chad Danforth/Ryan Evans, Ryan Evans & Sharpay Evans
Comments: 181
Kudos: 538





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> edited on completion: i originally thought this was going to be 4 chapters long, around 6k words max. hahaha, so much for that. 
> 
> i wanted to write ryan & chad being pretty wrapped up in each other, but i also wanted to depict the potential things that a relationship like this one might come with, therefore, discussions to confirm they're both on the same page, etc etc. 
> 
> let me know if you think i missed any tags!

It’s all a blur, but Ryan’s happy. When Gabriella had dragged him over to the baseball match and convinced him, somehow, to play, he’d expected it to be awkward, and to feel out of place, but he’d fit in neatly, and he hadn’t even needed to tone down the dancing. It’d been so good, _belonging_ , being in a team, all of that.

And he’d pitched, and Chad Danforth of all people had established some sort of friendly rivalry with him, goading him on, but nothing malicious in his smirk or his threats, as if they were actual friends and not just two boys who barely knew each other, who were now captains on opposite teams. And he’d batted, and they’d done the innings, and the game was nearly over, everything boiling down to the last minute, and Ryan had made the catch and thrown himself onto home base, but Chad had gotten there first, and he’d frozen, winded, covered in mud and dust and sweat and painfully aware of all the places their bodies were touching, and he’d finally managed to get up, and –

_This is it_ , Ryan tells himself. _Your five minutes of fun are over, none of these people are your friends. Time to get out of these clothes and leave them alone._

But just as he’s making his way back, Chad yells, with a fierce insistence to his tone, “Hey, Evans!”

Ryan doesn’t turn around, not sure what Chad will see in his face, but he goes entirely still, waiting. “Not saying I’m going to dance at the show. But if I did… what would you have me do?”

Ryan can’t control a small smile at that. He shrugs, doesn’t say anything. The moment feels heavy and unexpected, and Ryan sees this for what it is – an offer of friendship, or an alliance.

Not something he ever expected, and certainly not from Chad Danforth.

-

They sit very close together at lunch. Chad’s eyes on him are keen and watchful. He presses their shoulders together and listens attentively and smiles at Ryan, and he doesn’t seem to care that the rest of the Wildcats are there and are watching them, doesn’t seem bothered by what inevitably happens when you befriend the only out gay kid in all of high school.

He’d been far more relaxed about things than Ryan had been daring to imagine, joking about swapping clothes post shower. Ryan, ready to call him out on his bluff had said, “Sure, let’s do it,” and had been genuinely surprised when Chad threw him his jacket and took his hat, and asked, “What else do you want?” and he’d said, surprised, “Everything,” and Chad had laughed, and now there they were, wearing each other’s clothes.

Ryan’s answering some question Gabriella’s asking, something to do with theatre classes and the first production he’d starred in, and Chad is eating fries off a plate that’s wedged between both their plates, so that Ryan isn’t quite sure if it’s his plate or Chad’s.

It’s strangely boyfriendly, Ryan thinks, and feels almost guilty for thinking that. _This is why you have no friends,_ he thinks, leaning his head on Chad’s shoulder. He will take whatever little he gets, damn the guilt that he somehow ends up feeling in the process.

“Are you sure you’re not hungry?” Chad asks, and Ryan shrugs, picking at a carrot stick, and taking a tomato slice off the top of a salad.

“I’ll be fine,” Ryan says, and this entire moment is too intimate considering how little he and Chad knew each other before, but he can’t help it, there’s something about the way Chad is looking at him that is making him want to be forthcoming. “I always am.”

Chad hums. “I know,” he says, and then hands him a glass of something. “Got you a banana smoothie anyway, figured you could do with it.”

Ryan smiles.

-

The whole of the summer is strange and surreal. Ryan feels like one of the boys for the first time, and there’s the oddness of his friendship with Chad, who asks if he can borrow Ryan’s hats and says that he can’t dance, but walks with music in his steps all the same, and smiles at Ryan with genuine warmth, no longer the impersonal smile he’d shoot anyone and everyone back in school, and Ryan’s knees are weak.

He spends a lot of time to himself, though it’s not like he has many other options of where to be, given how Sharpay’s latest scheme involves ditching him in order to seduce Troy, or something along those lines. He feels like he’s balanced on a ledge, over a chasm; like he’s walking on a glass bridge and the smallest thing could hit very hard and cause the whole bridge to crack.

Ryan is used to feeling like this. He’s good at not letting it split him down in half.

And he doesn’t have Sharpay anymore. However much they clashed, she still looked out for him, and while nobody was scared of Ryan, everyone was intimidated enough by Sharpay that most people didn’t dare to mess with him, and he knew that was all due to her. Sharpay may not have been the most well-adjusted, or even most well-meaning person, but she _was_ his sister, and when she wasn’t too busy thinking about herself, she knew how to make him feel valued and important.

Ryan isn’t used to having friends other than Sharpay.

Chad sets something in motion – and that’s the thing, Chad thinks he’s uncool, or second only to Troy, or something along those lines, and Chad doesn’t realise he has his very own magnetism, his own pull, something about him that’s inherently alluring but also that makes people sit up and listen to him. Troy is a pretty boy, sure, but Chad has _substance,_ unlike Troy, who is inoffensive but uninteresting, Chad has a way of doing things that make an impact, often without even being aware of it. And so, Chad deciding to be friends with Ryan, publicly, loudly and gleefully, means that everyone wants to be friends with Ryan.

The boys talk to him about sports and video games, and Zeke brings him baked goods once, just for fun, and he sits with them during lunch and he listens, and all the while Chad looks at him with something soft in his expression that Ryan can’t parse, something gentle enough that it sets Ryan’s heart at ease. _This isn’t a prank._ He knows, with a certainty unlike anything he’s ever felt before, that Chad will not hurt him.

It’s the _certainty_ that scares him.

-

So the show comes to an end, and he’s given the award and Chad is grinning and Ryan sort of wants to cry, though he isn’t sure if it’d be happy crying or sad crying, just some sort of release of emotion. And they’re all there, under the stars, paired up in couples and Ryan thinks Chad will be with Taylor, but no, Chad’s right here, and they both sit together.

Ryan doesn’t feel up to talking, and Chad doesn’t push him, just sits there next to him.

_Don’t get your hopes up,_ Ryan tells himself. _This will all end soon, along with summer. Chad Danforth has better things to do than be here. Don’t get attached._

He thinks it’s a bit late for that, but Chad’s next to him and he’s warm, and Ryan _did_ just win an award he wasn’t expecting to win, not this year at least, so he lets himself give in to this singular moment of weakness, and curls up against Chad as they sit on the blanket together. And Chad puts an arm around him, and Ryan decides he does not care about how much this is going to hurt when it ends, as long as he can have this now.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chad pov!! finally, you get: taylor being amazing!  
> cw for mild discussion of racism and prejudice in this chapter, but it's not super heavy (at least, i hope not)

Chad’s actually looking forward to the first day of school, after the summer. This will be their last year, and he wants to make it count. He gets there early, hangs out with Taylor by the bleachers. Taylor’s got some science magazine, and she tells him about the latest scientific discovery, some new type of molecule that’s far above Chad’s level of understanding, but he listens anyway because it’s soothing, and familiar, and calming, listening to Taylor talk.

They sit there until it’s not early anymore, and then they head inside. Taylor sees Gabriella by her locker and heads over to talk to her, and Chad is alone until he sees the Evans twins walking towards Sharpay’s locker.

Ryan doesn’t look like he’s just following her, but he doesn’t look like he particularly wants to be there either, which gives Chad the courage to yell, “Evans, hey!”

Both twins turn, which – of course, Chad is an idiot, he should’ve known better than to call Ryan by a shared last name – but Ryan gives him a smile that looks fond and bemused in equal parts, while Sharpay gives him a sneer that he wonders if she learnt just for him.

“Come with me to class?” Chad asks Ryan. “You sit next to me, anyway.”

Ryan smiles, and it strikes Chad that he actually looks pleased, as well as surprised.

“Alright Danforth, lead the way,” Ryan says cheerfully, something in his steps making Chad wonder if he’s considering spontaneously breaking out into dance.

Chad knocks his shoulder against Ryan’s, gives him a little smile.

“Let’s go.”

-

Sometime over the summer, Chad had decided that he was proper friends with Ryan Evans, maybe even best friends, and that involved including him in every possible activity.

It’s great, until it isn’t.

Chad thinks he wouldn’t notice if he hadn’t been paying attention, but Ryan is actively withdrawing, pulling away from all of them, especially Chad, and that shouldn’t hurt the way it does, but it hurts. It _really_ hurts.

“Do you think I did something wrong?” he asks Taylor later.

Taylor is silent for a moment. “You need to talk to him,” she says. “And oh, Chad? Just because we’re all friends with you doesn’t mean Ryan is equally comfortable with everyone else. You know how the gang gets; I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s just overwhelmed.”

Chad has to admit that she has a very valid point.

-

He brings it up with Ryan later, during lunch, which he’s pulled the other boy aside for.

“Is something bothering you?” he asks. “Are you uncomfortable with this?”

Ryan looks at Chad, something in his expression entirely unreadable.

“You don’t get it, do you?” Ryan murmurs. “People looking at you and seeing something you’re not, because of an idea they have about you?”

Chad is mildly irritated now. “Ryan, I understand prejudice. Black boy in America, Home of the Brave, remember?”

Ryan goes still, and then looks up with a sort of miserable horror that unsettles Chad in some way he can’t express. “Shit, Chad, I just. Of course.” He covers his face in his hands, takes a small breath. “I’m sorry,” he says, and it’s clearly sincere. “I didn’t mean _that_ , I just didn’t think, I don’t know what things are like for you, obviously, I – ”

“Shh,” Chad says, more worried than anything now, and he puts an arm around Ryan. “Why don’t you tell me what you did mean, instead?”

Ryan is silent for a moment. Then, carefully, he says, “It’s exhausting being the only openly gay kid in high school.”

“Yeah?” Chad asks, softly.

Ryan nods, and rests his head on Chad’s shoulder. “I really am sorry, about the way I phrased that, earlier. I didn’t mean to imply that – ”

“No, I know, don’t worry,” Chad says. “It’s obviously different for us both, different axes of oppression working in different ways and all that, but I do think there are parallels, even if these things operate in vastly different ways. I definitely get, you know, feeling unsafe because of other people, but I have my family, and they’re a really big family. Being Black is something that’s comforting to me, something to be proud of, because all of the most inspiring people I know and care about are Black as well. I’ve never felt isolated or lonely or out of place because of it. You don’t have access to much community, do you?”

Ryan shakes his head. “Maybe one or two people, but it’s never been… I don’t know. I’ve been on my own for the most part.”

“Yeah, so that’s how _that_ is for you,” Chad says, and he’s aware he sounds sad. “And I can’t say I relate to that bit of it.”

Ryan exhales deeply. “Didn’t expect you to be so insightful.”

“Well, I am vast and I contain multitudes,” Chad says, which is something his cousin keeps saying to sway arguments in her favour. It’s worth it to see Ryan smile.

-

All that said, Chad does think about it sometimes. About whether he’s gay, or bisexual, or something else.

His feelings for Taylor, while had felt genuine at some point, have faded into obscurity, and he looks at her and sees someone he wants in his life all the time, just not romantically.

His feelings for Ryan, on the other hand, grow. With every single smile, every moment spent leaning against each other, all the time they spend when he’s not at practice, visiting each other’s houses, and Ryan’s sincerity and open vulnerability feels like a gift Chad still cannot believe he has been given; something he knows he must be careful with.

One night, sleepy enough that he’s likely unaware of what he’s even saying, Ryan admits that he’d been waiting for Chad to forget him. Chad has never wanted to kiss someone as much as he wants to kiss Ryan just then, but he doesn’t. He loops his arms around Ryan instead, holds him as close as he can, hoping the physical proximity says the things that he will not risk saying – not right now, when their friendship is still new and relatively delicate.

It's almost heartbreaking, but Chad doesn’t want to risk causing hurt without realising it, so he’s careful. After all, it’d be massively ignorant to assume that Ryan’s into him just because he’s gay and they’re close friends.

So, he hopes. But he doesn’t dare poke at it, or initiate.

He waits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's looking like this might have more chapters than expected.... cheers?


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> am i laying the feelings on too thick? maybe!  
> will i stop? no!
> 
> cw: ryan calls himself a pansy at one point in this one. it's not done in a hateful or self-desecrating way, more like him testing the waters and trying to see whether someone's being homophobic. but it is a thing that is there, so be aware!

Ryan knows it won’t be long before things end. When Chad’s warm and welcoming even during the new term, he waits for the other shoe to drop.

It takes a few months for him to wonder _what if this is just how it’s going to be now?_

Chad invites Ryan everywhere, looks like he’s happy to have him there, regards him with warmth.

It’s comforting in a way Ryan doesn’t want to risk getting used to. Nobody’s ever looked out for him before except for Sharpay, and with Sharpay that was sort of her job, as his twin sister.

“I think the jocks actually want to be my friend,” he tells Sharpay later, when they’re both at home. Sharpay’s got a spa thing in a bit, but she’s spending a few minutes destressing, drinking a low-calorie milkshake and reclining in the most comfortable chair in the room.

“Of course they want to befriend you, Ry,” Sharpay scoffs. “We’re the _Evans_ twins. You know what that means; we’re totally fabulous.”

“Yeah, but fabulous means different things on different people,” Ryan says. “Your being pretty makes people admire you and worship you. Me being pretty just makes people uncomfortable.”

Sharpay gives him a look, something thoughtful in it. “Is that really how you feel?”

“It’s something I _know_ ,” Ryan says. “There’s a whole world out there, one that I don’t fit into.”

“Ah,” Sharpay says, shaking her head. She slurps from her cup almost aggressively. “That’s not how an Evans would think. Ry, if the world doesn’t welcome you, you’ve got to twist it to shape. Tailormake it. Throw your weight around a little!”

 _Money and privilege_ , Ryan thinks. _I’m just a pretty boy with a trust fund._

He feels odd, sort of ugly inside. And he knows, like he’d known when starting this conversation, that this isn’t something Sharpay will ever be able to relate to.

He blinks, nods at her. “Might just do that, you know. Push people around. Get what I want.”

Sharpay smiles, all dazzle. “Great!”

She prances off somewhere, her heels making clacking noises against the linoleum. Ryan pulls his phone out of his pocket, looks over his shoulder just to check whether he’s alone. Texts Chad, _do u think i’m just a pretty boy w a trust fund?_

Chad’s response comes back almost instantly. _what’s wrong with being a pretty boy, mr evans? nd for the record, nah. i dont rlly think abt ur trust fund._

The next text surprises him. _u’ve got game,_ it says. _u know ur way around a baseball court. nothing else matters 2me._

Ryan smiles despite himself. _sports on your head always?_

The response is immediate. _dont u kno it :)_

Ryan shakes his head, smiling fondly. Somehow, he feels better already.

-

He texts Chad later in the evening. _Sorry if that was too much._

Again, the response is practically instant. _its not too much. we’re friends, arent we?_

 _yes,_ Ryan texts back, feeling like if he’s still enough he will be able to hear his own heartbeat, thudding in his chest.

 _friends tell each other things,_ Chad texts.

 _ok,_ Ryan sends back. _but if i ever cross any lines_

 _i will tell u,_ Chad’s message says. _dont worry about it._

-

Ryan invites Chad over, tentatively at first, but gradually evolving into a routine thing. They sit in Ryan’s room, play video games together. Chad seems surprised at how many video games Ryan has, and how good he is at them, but he quickly gets over it.

“What,” Ryan asks, the first time he registers Chad’s surprise, “Surprised the pansy can thrash your ass at Xbox?”

“Not in the least,” Chad says, giving him a little smile. “I expect surprises from you, Evans. If there’s anything that baseball game taught me, it’s that.”

“So then why do you seem so perplexed by the fact that I can play?” Ryan asks.

“I vaguely remember Troy and Jason discussing some of these games in class once, and I think they asked if anyone could play against them,” Chad admits. “You didn’t say anything, and I never thought – of course, I understand why you didn’t say anything, but – ”

“You do?” Ryan asks.

“Sort of?” Chad offers. “It’s hard to tell from the inside, but I’ve been told that we jocks can be a forceful, intimidating bunch to someone who doesn’t know us. Hell, maybe even to people who _do_ know us – you know how Zeke’s baking was like, his deep dark secret.”

Ryan leans against Chad, does a thing with his controller. “In your defence, practically everyone in high school was in cliques until Troy and Gabriella declared anarchy. It wasn’t just a jock thing.”

Chad laughs at that, and pushes back ever so slightly with his shoulder. “Sure, but at the same time, groups form because people fit together automatically, you know? Like, me and Troy, we had nothing in common but basketball at first, but that was something we both loved more than anything else, and that’s how we connected. So there’s a certain comfort to like, knowing the other person operates within the same paradigm as you.”

“Huh,” Ryan says. “Smart talk, man.”

“Yeah,” Chad says, grinning. “Hang around Taylor enough and you pick things up.”

Ryan smiles, but it doesn’t really reach his eyes. He’s not jealous of Taylor, not exactly – she _is_ the ex-girlfriend, and he knows that, but he knows he doesn’t have a shot at being Chad’s boyfriend, let alone ex, so it’s difficult not to be bitter.

Then again, he’s actively trying Not To Think Like That.

“But if that’s what makes people comfortable around each other,” Ryan says carefully, “what about us? You and me? We have nothing in common.”

“I like spending time with you,” Chad says, simply, as if that’s enough. “You may not get why I like basketball, and I can’t say a single correct thing about theatre, but I always appreciate what you have to say. You’re a fun person to hang out with. And that feeling’s mutual, I would hope?”

Ryan nods, putting his controller on the table. His character loses her final life, and he doesn’t particularly care – there’s always round 2 to win.

“I’ve never really had friends other than Sharpay,” he admits.

“Well, you have me now,” Chad says. “Any chance you have ice-cream somewhere in your house?”

“Duh,” Ryan says, sounding almost offended. He pauses the game, giving Chad his hand, pulling him up. “Let’s go.”

-

Chad and Ryan, like any two people, have their moments. There are moments in which Ryan missteps, moments in which he fucks up and apologizes and waits for _this_ to be the instant that Chad tires of him, but Chad is patient in a way Ryan would not have believed possible of anyone; especially not a jock.

When he accidentally implies that Chad’s never experienced prejudice, for instance, he expects Chad to get up and walk away and not come back. He doesn’t expect Chad to call him out on it, but to accept his apology and ask for an explanation all the same.

And Chad doesn’t always get what Ryan’s going through, Ryan can tell. He knows there are things he might need to explain, to break down, like the way he feels so boxed in by everyone all the time, how he acts larger than life to cover the fact that in reality, being Ryan Evans means being small, how being the only out gay kid in school wasn’t really his choice as much as a secret that it cost him too much to keep.

All the things that give Ryan joy, that make the feeling of being alive lighter and more bearable, are stereotypically “gay” things. Being closeted would’ve meant pretending to be someone he wasn’t, in more ways than one, and it was too much to demand from someone, so Ryan didn’t even try – he took it in the other direction, instead. Became as much of a performer as he could, bright lights, glitter and smiles and everything.

He thinks, sometimes, that Chad can see through it all; can tell how much of it is more of a defence mechanism than anything else.

But then again, Chad’s paying attention. Nobody else has ever done that before.

-

There’s this one specific moment during a sleepover at Chad’s place (and _yes_ , that’s a thing they do; Ryan had tried to hide his surprise the first time Chad invited him over but he isn’t sure he’d quite succeeded) when Ryan almost lets himself hope that Chad _likes_ him.

He’d been lying in bed, sleepy, and he’d said something depressing and honest and blunt, the sort of thing a wide awake Ryan Evans would never say, something about expecting Chad to forget him eventually. And Chad had given him a look, a startled, almost horrified look, before gently reaching for him and holding him in his arms.

There had been a moment there where Ryan had thought Chad was going to kiss him. The moment didn’t pass, but shifted into something else, instead. Ryan just let himself be held, and closed his eyes.

Chad didn’t say anything, but the way he was holding Ryan was gentle in a way that Ryan knew meant _something._

The real question was, what could it mean? Probably not what Ryan was hoping for, but definitely a good thing anyway.

He was friends with Chad Danforth. Maybe even _best friends_ with Chad Danforth.

Surely, that had to be enough. Ryan would make do with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't know much about bowling, but hey: i tried!  
> also: fluff!

It’s a regular Friday in October when Chad calls Ryan and invites him to go bowling. Ryan doesn’t put up much resistance, just asks Chad for the address and promises to meet him there in half an hour.

The bowling alley is at walking distance from Chad’s house, and a pretty lowkey place, so Chad sets out immediately, the moment Ryan has confirmed. He pays attention to the sound of his footsteps pattering on the ground, letting it get him out of his head.

Chad gets there fifteen minutes early and waits, and Ryan drives in exactly on time. His smile fades a little as he pulls into parking and sees Chad.

“I’m not late, am I?” Ryan asks anxiously.

“No, you’re alright,” Chad says, fighting down the sudden urge to call Ryan ‘babe’, which was weird, he’d never felt that around Taylor before. But then again, Taylor had never looked at him like this, tentative despite it not being a big deal, and Chad wanted to do something to mitigate the part of Ryan that was clearly waiting for Chad to drop him – which, _no_. “I got here early, Evans, don’t worry about it.”

Ryan smiles, and walks over to Chad. “Okay. Want to get started?”

-

Ryan is good at bowling – this, specifically, does not surprise Chad. He’s seen the boy pitch, after all, he knows a good arm and sense of aim when he sees it. Ryan is _better than Chad_ at bowling – _this_ surprises Chad. Not in a way that makes him glower with rage or anything, but in a way that makes him stare at Ryan, wide-eyed, like he’s never seen him before.

Ryan seems aware of this, and smirks smugly. He rolls another strike – all he’s done so far is roll strikes, with the exception of one spare, and that one had been almost a strike; he’d knocked out nine pins instead of ten.

“So, Evans,” Chad says, smiling, “where did you learn to play like that?”

“Surprised?” Ryan asks, the look on his face clearly showing that he already knows the answer.

“Yes, but not for the reason you think.” Chad focuses as he rolls, hits an eight. He can definitely make it a spare if he focuses, and there’s no possible way for him to beat Ryan with the lead he’s got, so he’s just focusing on getting his score as high as possible. “Bowling’s just, I put a lot of time into it, you know?” he says. He rolls, and hits just one pin out of the two.

“Hmm?” Ryan asks. He doesn’t roll, despite it being his turn.

“Bowling is,” Chad frowns, and then gestures at Ryan to finish. “Go ahead, don’t let me distract you.”

“I don’t know, you seem weirdly into this,” Ryan says, studying Chad’s face. “I mean, you’re into sports in general, classic jock, I know, I _know._ But something about this feels like it means something different to you.”

“It’s personal,” Chad says, and watches as Ryan scowls, sends the ball off and gets another strike.

“No, I didn’t mean I wouldn’t tell you,” Chad clarifies, putting a hand on Ryan’s shoulder. “I meant, with most sports I just have fun playing them. Bowling isn’t like that.”

“No?” Ryan asks.

“No,” Chad says. “My elder sister and I used to do this all the time, when we were younger.”

“I didn’t know you had an elder sister,” Ryan says.

“She’s like, seven years older than me, dude,” Chad says. He rolls distractedly, gets the ball in the gutter. “Shit.”

Ryan seems torn between being amused and being concerned. Still, he knocks his shoulder against Chad’s. “Get your head in the game, Wildcat,” he enthuses.

“You did _not_ just go cheerleader on me,” Chad says, but he’s smiling. He manages to knock down seven pins, which is not too bad, all things considered.

“So,” Ryan says, watching. “Sister?”

“Yeah,” Chad says. “We used to be really close as kids, but you know, as you do. Grew up and grew apart. I miss her, but I don’t know what to do to bridge the gap.”

“Hmm,” Ryan says. He looks sympathetic, but lost. “Can’t really say I relate.”

“Yeah, I get that,” Chad says softly.

They both study each other’s faces in silence for a bit. Chad considers telling him that he’s never told anyone about this, not even Troy, that he’s never actually taken any of the Wildcats bowling before, because in this space he’s Chad Danforth in a way that he isn’t anywhere else, but Chad knows that a confession like that carries a certain weight, and he doesn’t want to subject Ryan to it out of the blue.

“Right, okay,” Ryan says, looking back at the pins. “So we’re playing three games?”

Chad nods. “Yeah, let’s do that. Unless you’d rather….?”

“Oh, no, no,” Ryan smiles. “I like bowling.”

-

Halfway through their second game (and Ryan is probably going to make a perfect game the way this is headed, and Chad can’t grudge him that – if anything, he’s excited – the only time he’s ever seen anyone get a 300 score was his sister, that one time, and it’s nice having competition, even if Ryan is far too good for Chad to even have a shot at winning, really), Chad remembers that he still doesn’t know how Ryan is this good.

“You never answered my question,” he says to Ryan.

“Hmm?” Ryan asks, distracted.

Chad rolls, hits a strike, beams, hands the ball to Ryan.

“How are you so good at this?” Chad gives him a smile, so Ryan knows there’s no resentment there. Between being Taylor’s boyfriend for many months, and almost getting his ass handed to him on the baseball diamond by Ryan, any toxic masculinity he’s had has been pretty thoroughly eradicated.

Chad isn’t threatened by someone being better than him at sports; if anything, he’s turned on, but Ryan doesn’t need to know that.

Ryan rolls another strike easily, and looks up at Chad.

“When I was like, twelve,” he begins, moving aside and gesturing for Chad to bowl, “there was this guy I liked, and he was majorly into bowling, and I spent the entire summer practicing in the hope that I’d impress him.”

Chad, somehow, rolls a strike. He looks at Ryan, who’s expression seems pensive. “What happened?”

“Nothing happened,” Ryan says, shrugging. “He was sixteen, I was twelve, I don’t think I even realised it was a crush, you know? I just wanted him to notice me.”

Chad hums.

“Yeah, so that’s my bowling origin story,” Ryan says, and he sounds almost bitter.

“Whoa, hey,” Chad says, knocking Ryan’s shoulder with his. “I still think it’s cool.”

“You think it’s cool that I tried to learn bowling _to seduce a jock?_ ” Ryan asks. The level of horror in the statement is almost as though Chad has confessed to secretly having an affair with Ryan’s mother, or something.

“I wouldn’t say seduce, weren’t you like, tiny?” Chad asks. “And to be frank, yeah? That’s impressive, dude. Remember how Troy did the whole musical thing as a part of flirting with Gabriella? It’s literally the same thing, except you’re much better at bowling than Troy is at musicals. Don’t tell Troy.”

That gets a smile out of Ryan, but it’s short lived. “You really mean to say that you, a jock, aren’t weirded out by the idea of someone learning a sport to flirt with you?”

“Honestly?” Chad asks. “I’d be flattered. Sport, any sport, is so important to me – for someone to take the effort to learn a new sport for me, that’s the highest compliment. And that’s pretty considerate.”

“A lot of people would be creeped out,” Ryan says.

“Well, that’s on them,” Chad says. “You’re amazing. Look how good you are at bowling. You literally learnt a new skill that you kept, over the years. So what if your motives were gay? That doesn’t detract from the skill, at all.”

Chad isn’t sure if Ryan is blushing, or if it’s the lighting, but he looks a lot more relaxed now. “Thanks.”

“Your turn,” Chad says gently, handing Ryan a bowling ball. “You can probably get a three hundred this game, go for it.”

“You’re not… upset that you’re losing?” Ryan asks, confused.

“I mean, I’d like to win, sure,” Chad says nonchalantly. “But the way you’re playing is legendary stuff, and I’m having fun watching. So, you know. Kick my ass. Go, Evans!”

“Who’s a cheerleader now,” Ryan murmurs, but he’s smiling, and he looks more comfortable now than he did before the entire conversation. He bowls perfectly, hits a strike as expected.

Chad cheers, as if Ryan’s on his team, instead of the competition.

“I can’t believe you’re better than this at baseball,” he says, smiling. “How many hidden talents do you have, Evans?”

“If I tell you, they won’t be hidden anymore,” Ryan says, and is he _flirting?_

Chad scoffs, gives him the same look that he’d given him when he’d said, teasingly, that he’d be making a triple, not a curtain call. Ryan smiles back, unintimidated.

Chad _really_ hopes that it was flirting.

He bowls best he can, hits six pins. Murmurs “FUCK” under his breath, and looks at Ryan, who’s clearly trying not to laugh.

 _You’re my best friend,_ he thinks. He’s surprised by the certainty of the feeling.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **right before we head into chap 5** , [TheKaiserRoll drew this absolutely beautiful piece ](https://thekaiserroll.tumblr.com/post/631079739359100928/yes-im-still-obsessed-with-chad-ryan-from) from the events of the last chapter!! i was going to put this in the chapter notes for ch4, but then realised that people who’ve been reading every update as it comes might miss seeing it, so i’m linking it here instead :)  
> ~  
> this chapter has an discussion of a past traumatic event, but it's pretty vague - they don't really go into the incident. i feel like it's on par with the level of angst and sadness you'd expect from ryan (esp in this particular story) but just a heads up. 
> 
> also, i wrote sharpay, and she's nice!!

Chad drives him home, and Ryan can’t stop smiling. They hug briefly before going their own ways, and Chad gives him a small smile, and says that they’ll see each other in school tomorrow, and Ryan beams back and says, yes, they will.

He refrains from whistling as he enters the house, but he can’t keep the skip out of his step. He’s dancing more than walking, and he hopes that Sharpay’s somewhere else, because he knows if she witnesses this, he isn’t going to be able to wriggle out of an investigation. Shar cares for him in her own strange omnipresent way, he can’t grudge her that, and he’s rarely ever happy like this; happy in a way that makes him feel like a helium balloon – afloat and at ease and grateful to the world.

His luck does not hold. As he’s walking up the stairs he sees her, fruit drink in hand, probably on the way back to her own room to watch a movie or update her myspace, or both. She sees him, and stops in her tracks, walking up to him.

Nobody knows you like a twin does. Sharpay raises her eyebrow, gives Ryan a look.

Ryan shrugs, but he can’t stop smiling.

“Wait,” Sharpay says, raising an eyebrow. “ _Ryan._ ”

Ryan smirks. “Yes, Shar?”

“You didn’t – ” She seems almost at a loss for words, caught between being excited for him and annoyed to not be let in on what’s happening and being worried about him. “Did you…”

Ryan waits for her to finish, making a gesture with his hands that says _go ahead_. It takes all his restraint not to give her jazz hands; he doesn’t want her thinking he got laid, or that he now has a steady boyfriend (even if those are things that he wants.)

“You seem happy,” Sharpay tries again. “ _Really_ happy.”

Ryan nods. “It’s not whatever you’re thinking. But I _am_ really happy.”

“Correct me, then. What happened?” Sharpay raises an eyebrow. “You were out with Danforth, right?”

 _Out with Danforth._ Ryan swallows, feeling giddy with disbelief, but also grounded by it.

“We went bowling, talked a bit,” Ryan tells her.

Sharpay gestures to him, a _follow me_ kind of gesture, and he knows they’re going to have a Big Conversation – he can’t possibly evade this. But a tiny part of him feels glad for it; Sharpay’s one of the only people he can really gush about his crush to, he just hopes she doesn’t shoot him down over it.

They enter Sharpay’s room together, and sit down on the bed, facing each other.

“You went _bowling_ with Chad Danforth,” Sharpay prompts.

Ryan grins. “I went bowling with Chad Danforth, and I won!”

Sharpay squeals in excitement, and gives him a hug. And then, she looks at his face.

“You don’t actually care about winning,” she notices. “You aren’t gleeful in _that_ way, Ryan. What’s going on?”

She stares at him for a moment, waiting, and he meets her gaze.

“I really, really like Chad,” Ryan admits. “And I really trust him, Shar. Today was really special. I feel like I can actually be myself around him.”

Sharpay gives him a thoughtful, calculating look.

“Ryan,” she says, gently, and he frowns, looks away.

“You don’t need to look out for me this time,” Ryan says. He doesn’t mean for it to sound bitter, but it does.

Sharpay looks sad now. “He’s a _jock_ , Ry,” she says, as if Ryan has forgotten. “Are you… do you really see this going anywhere?”

“I don’t know if he can or ever will feel the same way,” Ryan says, and he knows how he sounds – resigned, and sort of sad, but not miserable or very upset. “But he respects me, and he listens to me, and it’s like, he can see who I am in all gay flamboyance and he isn’t uncomfortable with it, or even mildly bothered by it.”

He waits for Sharpay to say something cutting, maybe like _the bar is that low,_ but she just looks sad.

“I trust your judgement,” she says, which is a lot, coming from Sharpay. “And you’re sure he’s like, a good ally and everything?”

“Yeah,” Ryan says. He gazes off into the distance. “We’ve, uh, had conversations. About gay things. And I told him about one of my crushes on a jock, and he took it a lot better than I expected him to. It’s like, most people are comfortable with having a gay friend in theory, but in reality, I’m too much for them, right? He doesn’t make me feel like that. I don’t feel like I need to put on a performance or present a certain way with him.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” Sharpay says. “Even if it _is_ Danforth – you have horrible taste in men, did you see how many watches he was wearing that time? And, for what? Does he have friends in different time zones, or something? Because if it was a fashion statement, it was _so_ not working.”

Ryan smiles; this is regular Sharpay. But his luck doesn’t hold, again, because she shoots him a loaded glance, one that says _we’re going to have a discussion now that you WILL not like._

“Spit it out, sis,” he says.

“Listen,” she says. “If you get close with him – and I’m not talking boyfriend-close, I’m talking on a friends level – you’re going to have to tell him about The Incident, sooner or later. It will definitely come up. Especially since you befriended him on the baseball diamond, like, Ryan, seriously. You broke your own rule, there.”

Ryan swallows, remembers how Chad had checked him out on the court, and had asked, “You got game?” like he was delivering a pick-up line.

“I couldn’t help it,” Ryan says softly. “He was _there._ ”

He doesn’t bring up the whole ‘ _if you hadn’t tried and nearly succeeded at seducing Troy and using our wealth to coerce him into falling for you, none of this would’ve happened_ ’ thing because that’s a low blow; Sharpay _knows_ what she did crossed a line, and he won’t get anywhere by rubbing it in her face.

She doesn’t go there, either. “I just don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“I know,” Ryan says. “You’ve said as much. Multiple times, in fact.”

“The Incident is _going_ to come up,” she tells him. “He’s a jock, Ry. You can’t avoid it.”

“I can _handle_ it,” Ryan says.

The Incident, also known as The Primary Reason Ryan Evans Dropped Baseball, is something they never talk about. Sharpay was, after all, around for the worst of it, and Ryan doesn’t particularly want to rehash the details out ever, if he can help it. But he feels, in his gut, that with Chad, he won’t have to. He can just give him a brief overview, a “this terrible thing happened to me and fucked me up and I can’t talk about it even now.”

“Shar,” Ryan says, the tone in his voice almost a plea, asking her to listen. “I feel like he’ll understand. He knows I’m on edge and nervous all the time, we sort of had a conversation about that already. He’s understanding of other things too, like, he sent me an email in comic sans once and I asked him why he did that, because nobody even likes comic sans as a font, aesthetically, and he said that he’d heard that it was easier to read for people with dyslexia, and did I want him to use another font? And he didn’t make a big deal of it. I don’t want to talk to him about The Incident, but I know that if I do, he’ll probably side with me.”

 _Probably_ being the keyword there. Ryan wishes he could say _certainly_ , but he knows how jocks in general are – they think of the team before they think of people, and Chad _isn’t_ like that, but Ryan’s been let down too many times to trust anybody with full, hundred percent faith.

Sharpay is looking at him with a different expression now, something more unreadable. It’s a bit frightening, not being able to read her expression – Ryan knows most of Sharpay’s expressions; it’s really the only way to stay ahead.

“What?” he asks.

She gives him a hug, and he’s surprised enough by the spontaneity of it that it takes him a minute to hug her back.

“I want the people in your life to be people who respect you and adore you,” she says with a fierceness that makes Ryan remember, again, that when she’s not too busy being ambitious or sneaky, Sharpay would do anything for him, _literally_ anything, even if it was illegal. “You deserve only the best things.”

“What, because I’m an Evans?” Ryan asks, raising an eyebrow.

Her arms around him tighten for a moment, holding him more firmly.

“No,” she says. “Because you’re my brother.”

Ryan relaxes into the hug, and then, pulls away. He takes the fruit drink from Shar and sips, smiling as she shrieks.

“So,” he says. “Want to watch a movie?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [apparently i have a hsm tumblr sideblog now?](https://sharpevans.tumblr.com/) feel free to say hi!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here, finally, is the chapter with the climax of the plot, and the chapter that is referenced heavily in the summary of this story. richard siken's crush won the yale younger poets prize in 2004, so timeline wise it fits - like: the book exists. as expected from a chapter with siken references, there's discussion of past homophobia.

The next day, Chad is excited to get to school early, because while it is just another day, it’s still another day he gets to see Ryan. He gets there, and as he often does when he’s early, the first person he sees is Taylor, sitting by the bleachers, doing the crossword.

“Hey, Wildcat,” she says, looking up as he walks past. “You look chipper, what’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Chad says, but he’s grinning.

“Doesn’t look like nothing,” Taylor says.

“I hung out with Ryan yesterday,” Chad tells her. “It felt… different. More intimate.”

Taylor waits for him to go on, tapping her pencil against the newspaper as she watches him intently.

“He’s a really good friend, Tay,” Chad says.

“Just a friend?” Taylor asks, and Chad’s heart skips a beat. He stares at her, wide-eyed.

“What do you….”

Taylor gives him a look that is almost nervous. “Chad, you’re not leading him on, are you?”

This is somehow worse. Chad wants to say, _what, do you think he likes me just because he’s gay?_ but it’s Taylor saying this, and Chad trusts Taylor’s judgement; he knows that she wouldn’t say something without a rational thought behind it.

“What do you mean by that?” Chad asks. “It’s not like he has a crush on me.”

Taylor gives him a look. “Are you so certain of that?”

“Why would he have a crush on me?” Chad asks, perplexed. “I’m so different from him, and he’s totally out of my league.”

“Well, you’re very different from me, and I am totally out of your league, too,” Taylor says, grinning. “Yet, at some point…”

“Touché,” Chad says, smiling. “But still, Tay. What makes _you_ so certain that he likes me?”

Taylor gives him a thoughtful look. “Maybe, as someone who liked you once, I can see the signs on someone else?”

Chad closes his eyes and shakes his head, still smiling. He’s really lucky to be on good terms with his ex-girlfriend.

“He looks at you all the time, when you’re not looking,” Taylor says, softer. “The way Troy looks at Gabriella.”

Chad swallows, looks at Taylor. _I hope you’re right,_ he thinks. _Because that’s how I feel about him, too._

“Okay,” he says instead. “I mean, there’s no accounting for taste, but….”

“That’s my ex-boyfriend you’re talking about, watch what you say,” Taylor says, rolling up her newspaper and gently swatting at his shoulder with it. She glances at her watch, and then nods at him. “We should head inside, bell’s going to go any minute.

Chad nods, realising they’ve spent so long outside that his next best bet at hanging out with Ryan is during the break. He follows Taylor in, and they go their separate ways to their lockers. Chad’s in a bit of a hurry, so he’s not really looking where he’s going. He sees Ryan, who is similarly in a rush, but hasn’t seen him yet.

Ryan’s distracted enough that he collides with Chad, running into him despite Chad moving aside. 

He looks up at Chad, startled, as his bag drops to the floor. Books and stationery fall everywhere, and Chad helps Ryan put everything back into his bag right before the first bell. When the bell goes, Ryan gives him a grateful smile and runs off for his class.

It’s only once Ryan’s gone that Chad notices the slim paperback lying on the floor, probably something Ryan missed putting back in his bag. Chad picks it up, just to check that it’s Ryan’s and wasn’t something lying on the floor before they showed up.

-

It’s a tiny book, thin enough that Chad could put it inside his jacket pocket and not have anyone notice, and it’s titled CRUSH by someone called Richard Siken whom Chad has never heard of. The first page has Ryan’s name in his cursive handwriting, looped elegantly in purple ink of all things. _Ryan Evans._

Chad puts it in his bag carefully, and gets his phone out, discreetly sending off a text to Ryan. 

“u dropped a book – poetry or smthng? will give it to u today, tell me when?”

He gets a response immediately. “haha yeah, i carry too many plays and poems around. come over after school, once ur done w practice?”

That would be it, if they hadn’t been assigned self-study in chemistry. Their chapter on organic chemistry looks very boring, and Chad, who’s always been a fast reader even if he never advertised it, finds it easy to pull out Ryan’s poetry book and slip it between the pages of his chemistry textbook.

He reads the poems in order, figuring that if Ryan wouldn’t want him to read it he would’ve said so, but once he’s done he thinks he’s shaking, maybe even visibly.

Taylor shoots him a worried look, but she doesn’t ask. He knows she’s waiting for _him_ to say something.

He just shrugs back. He isn’t sure what there is to say.

-

“I think I’m going to skip practice today,” he says to Troy. “Let your dad know?”

“Why?” Troy asks, but the look in his eyes is puzzled rather than anything else. He looks concerned in a way that, on someone who isn’t Troy, would probably be ‘motherly.’

“Something’s bothering me,” Chad says honestly. “I’ve got to resolve something, and until I’ve sorted it out, I’m gonna be no good on the field, dude.”

“Okay,” Troy says, accepting that as reason enough. He gives Chad half a hug, wrapping an arm around him and pulling him close, shoulder to shoulder. “Go, fix your shit. Make it quick. We’ll need you tomorrow.”

Chad nods, and leaves.

-

Chad drives over to Ryan’s house, and asks to meet Ryan at the door.

Ryan leads him into a parlour on the ground floor, and Chad thinks, yet again, about how big their house is.

“We won’t be interrupted here,” Ryan promises. “So, book?”

In lieu of a reply, Chad pulls out the paperback, and holds it up so Ryan can see the cover.

When Ryan sees the book, he pales visibly.

“Hey,” Chad says, as gently as possible, handing it over. “Don’t freak out, but I read this during chemistry.”

“All of it?” Ryan asks. There’s something in his tone that’s unreadable, and he’s shifted positions so that the hat he’s wearing hides his face.

“All of it,” Chad agrees. Wondering how to proceed sensitively, he says, “Is it really like this for you all the time? So much… queer pain?”

“Agony, and fear, yeah,” Ryan admits, and he’s decidedly not looking at Chad.

Chad wants to do something about that, but he’s not sure what. Tentatively, he puts an arm on Ryan’s shoulder, and Ryan sighs before letting Chad pull him into a warm hug.

“I get what we were talking about earlier,” Chad tells him. “Like, I think I understand. The isolation that comes with being certain about being gay, particularly given where we live, and how people around us are.”

Ryan murmurs something that sounds like “okay” into his shoulder, but then he shifts his hands to grasp Chad’s forearms, and moves away a little. They’re still sitting very close, and it’s almost intimate how close they are.

Chad usually wouldn’t think too much of it – they’ve sat pressed up against each other too many times, and they’ve shared the bed during sleepovers – but Taylor’s words from the morning stick in his head. He doesn’t get time to dwell on it, though, because Ryan shifts a little, looks at him.

“I never told you why I stopped playing baseball,” Ryan says to Chad.

 _I never asked,_ Chad wants to say. He thinks of Ryan, on the diamond, singing, dancing, _glowing_ , happy; he thinks he’s always known, without Ryan ever needing to say anything, that whatever happened that made him give it up would’ve had to hurt him really badly.

Chad waits, nodding for him to go on.

Ryan shifts a bit, moving out of the hug so that they’re sitting side by side, only their shoulders touching. He’s deliberately not looking at Chad, staring at his hands instead. Chad understands the urge.

“It’s probably not as bad as whatever’s going through your mind, it’s just,” Ryan takes a shaky breath, and goes on, quiet. “There was…” he stops, looks into the distance, haunted. “A lot of things happened, most of which I still can’t talk about. I was like, ten at the time?”

Chad moves his hand carefully, holding one of Ryan’s hands. Not saying a word, just waiting.

Ryan stares at their interlinked hands, still not speaking. Then, finally, he says, “The bottom line is, my entire team turned on me, because they knew.” He pauses, and then adds, “They knew that I was somehow different, and that made them uncomfortable.”

Ryan chances a look at Chad’s face, and probably sees something there, because he says, carefully, “Chad, whatever you’re thinking of, like, the worst situations in your mind, they didn’t do _that_. But they threatened me, in a big way. They made me feel like they could do anything to me and get away with it. I can’t shake that level of fear, even now.”

Chad stares at Ryan, and then puts an arm around him. “I’m so sorry they did that to you.”

“They wanted me off the team,” Ryan says quietly. “They wouldn’t have stopped at anything, to get me to leave. They made that very clear in many ways.”

A bit of the Siken is coming back to Chad now, the bit about how ‘ _a boy who likes boys is a dead boy_ ,’ and he wants to ask about it, but he knows now isn’t the time. Ryan looks fragile enough as is, if they’re ever going to talk more about this it has to be on Ryan’s terms, he knows that.

What Chad wants to say to Ryan goes along the lines of, _so now you feel like you can’t really get close to any boys, because they’ll turn on you the moment they suspect that you like them, and god, maybe you didn’t even like those boys but they were all wary of you anyway, and_ Ryan _, you’ve been telling me this all along – even when you weren’t telling me this, you were building up to it, and I think I understand_ – but that’s too much.

Focusing on the key points, he says instead, “I’d be shattered if my team turned on me even now, and I’m much older than you were, then. I don’t know how to express this feeling, Ry, but I understand how something like that could’ve hurt so majorly, and impacted you so much. I’m so sorry that they did that, and it means a lot that, you know, you trusted me with this.”

Ryan looks up at him, his eyes big and watery, and _fuck_ , Chad doesn’t want to see him cry.

“I’m so glad we became friends,” Chad says, gently. “You’re brilliant, and wonderful, and talented, and sweet, and one of my favourite people ever – ”

Ryan cuts Chad off, then, shifting to face Chad, leaning over him, and kissing him, quickly, rapidly, in one singular fluid moment.

Chad melts into the kiss, into Ryan. His hands shift, one hand pressing against Ryan’s lower back, holding him in place, the other hand resting on his shoulder, fingers splayed out. It feels lovely, and it would be easy to lose himself in the moment, but Ryan is trembling as he presses himself up against Chad, his grip tight and almost desperate, and Chad knows, with a sudden shocking certainty, that he likes Ryan too much, that he might even love Ryan, and something like that deserves a conversation. He needs to know that they’re on the same page.

Chad pulls away. It feels like a superhuman effort.

“Ryan,” he says, softly, carefully. “We shouldn’t. Not like this.”

Ryan’s eyes, when they meet his gaze, are deeply sad. “I think you’re right,” he says, quietly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i sure do love my angst!  
> unconnectedly: the next chapter will probably surprise you. probably.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you everyone who left sweet comments on the previous chapter!! i must admit, though, i was surprised because i was expecting the comments to be more in the "how DARE you ivermectin" vein. 
> 
> the surprise for this chapter is that it's sharpay POV!  
> cw: small, implied mention of underage drinking.

When Sharpay gets back home, hair redone to perfection, she’s belting out a Broadway show tune and waiting for Ryan to echo back a response. Instead, she’s met with silence, which doesn’t sit particularly well with her.

“RYAN!” She huffs, pulls her phone out of her purse just to check whether he’s responded to her text. There is, surprisingly, nothing. “It’s _your_ line! How are we supposed to be a _double_ act if you don’t do _your_ half!”

The silence is worrying. Sharpay’s pretty sure she hasn’t done anything to earn Ryan’s wrath this time – no schemes, no usurping him for the leading role, no messing with his choreography (it was _one_ time, she doesn’t understand why he’s still pissy about it) so, given all this, the fact that there’s no response from Ryan is highly concerning.

She frowns, begins to walk around the ground floor looking for him. She finally finds him in the penultimate parlour, the one she knows he likes, with the light pastel green wallpaper, lace curtains and pretty lamps. He’s curled up on himself in the sofa, barefoot, his shoes and socks carelessly on the ground.

This is a sign that things are not alright. Ryan is, typically, when it comes to situations like this, neat and orderly. It is, however, a sign that things aren’t as bad as they could be – he’s not putting his shoes on the sofa, after all.

“Ryan,” Sharpay says. She’s careful to keep the pity out of it; Ryan doesn’t want it. He never has.

Ryan looks up, his eyes red. “Any chance you could get me a drink?”

She sits next to him, instead, and puts an arm around him. He leans against her, their heads touching.

“Shar,” he says softly. “I fucked up.”

-

She does get him the drink, because he looks miserable, and he isn’t allowed to look miserable, it’s just not right.

Ryan sips, gives her a look. “Sis. Not strong enough.”

“How badly did you fuck up, exactly?” Sharpay asks.

Ryan is carefully not looking at her, and his body language is entirely tense and angled away. “I kissed Chad Danforth.”

“I take it that didn’t go well,” Sharpay prompts.

“It was entirely _unsolicited_ on my part,” Ryan says, clearly shaken. “I just threw myself at him. He clearly wants nothing to do with me.”

“That does not sound like the Ryan Evans I know,” Sharpay says. “You would never do that. I need context.”

“Okay, I’d, uh, told him,” Ryan murmurs. He looks sadder now, if possible. “I told him about The Incident. As much as I could, which is not much, and he was so lovely and understanding about it. He said some really nice things about me, that I was one of his favourite people, and he was looking at me like he actually liked me. And I didn’t think it through, it felt clear in that moment that he wanted me like that, so I kissed him. And he kissed me back, for a moment, and then he withdrew, like, I’m not even worth a pity kiss, or something? He didn’t want to kiss me. He made that clear, so I told him I needed some space and some time alone, and I’ve been here since.”

Sharpay wants to stare at him. Wants to say, _but you were so happy. Yesterday, even, you were so happy._ She’s not particularly fond of Chad, but he _had_ seemed to genuinely care about Ryan, jock or no. He’d included Ryan in things, gone out of his way to spend time with her brother, even had custom t-shirts printed with slogans of encouragement for Ryan.

“Listen,” she says carefully. “I don’t particularly care for Danforth, you know that. But do you think there could’ve been a misunderstanding?”

“You’re not saying ‘I told you so,’” Ryan says, awed, and Sharpay isn’t sure whether he’s talking to her or to himself. His tone shifts quickly into something more angry. “You’re actually taking _his_ side?”

“I’m not taking anybody’s side, okay?” Sharpay says, giving him an exasperated look. “I just want you to be happy, and you were so happy before this.”

Ryan shifts slightly. “Hey. All things must come to an end, right?”

It kills her inside to see him looking so defeated.

“I really want something stronger to drink,” Ryan says softly, settling the glass on the table by the sofa, before lying down on the sofa, his feet on Sharpay’s lap. Sharpay is worried enough that she considers not complaining, but standards must be maintained always, so she gets up abruptly, and says, “Gross! Those are your _feet_ , Ryan, they belong _on the ground!_ ”

Ryan smiles and shakes his head ever so slightly.

“I’m calling Mother,” Sharpay says, gently. “And I’ll organise for someone to get you those iced cookies you really like.”

Ryan sighs. “Why do I feel like he broke up with me? We weren’t even together. He doesn’t even like me.”

“Well, _Ducky_ ,” Sharpay says, touching her index finger with his, “you know you’re talking to the wrong person if you want a heart to heart.”

“What do you suggest I do?” Ryan asks.

“Find his basketball jersey and draw a penis on it,” Sharpay says cheerily.

“Yeah, talking to Mom instead, thank you,” Ryan says. He gets up, rubs at his eyes with his hands, picks up his shoes and socks, gives her a genuine nod. “Thank you, Shar.”

“Don’t _thank_ me, just stop moping!” Sharpay insists. “I want jazz squares from you, and I want them NOW!”

Ryan holds his shoes up in lieu of the jazz square, and walks out of the room. He manages a smile that doesn’t reach his eyes, but kudos for effort, Sharpay guesses. She texts her mother quickly. Then, staring at the number that she’d discreetly copied from Ryan’s phone, _just in case_ , she takes a few deep breaths, before she dials.

“Danforth? Clear your schedule. I’m coming to your house, and I’m coming _immediately._ I’ll be there in forty minutes, pronto! _No,_ I don’t care about your curfew. I need to talk to you, face to face. You can apologise when I _get there._ Tell your parents that it’s urgent! _No_ , I don’t care. You should’ve thought of that before. Urghhh. Bye!”

She’s not sure what’s going on, but she knows one thing. She is Sharpay Evans; everything is salvageable. She can fix this. She _will_ fix this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't @ me, we're all in this together


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here we go!

The first thing Chad does after leaving the Evans’s house is call Taylor. He drives away, and then pulls his car over when he’s halfway there, and rings her up.

“I think you were right, about Ryan liking me,” he tells her, after they’ve exchanged hellos.

“Oh?” She asks, thoughtful. “Why are you telling me this, Chad?”

“Because I like him too,” Chad gets out, and it’s rushed and unsure, but he means it with every fibre of his being, and he thinks Taylor can probably tell. “Tay, I like him so much.”

“Oh my god,” she says, but she says it evenly, not dramatizing it. “Thank you for telling me, I’m proud of you. Is there anything you need from me, like, I don’t know, a plan for seducing him?”

Chad laughs. “I don’t know,” he says. “I think I just need to sit down and talk to him. I’m hopeful it’ll work out.”

“It better,” Taylor says. “As your ex-girlfriend, I am hundred percent rooting for you.”

“You’re so weird,” Chad says, smiling. “Thank you.”

“For being weird?”

“For being here. You’re the first person I’ve told.”

“Awww,” she gushes, and Chad smiles despite himself. “I would hug you if I was there.”

"You can hug me at school tomorrow,” Chad tells her.

“If anyone gives you any shit, I will make them regret it,” Taylor promises. “Okay?”

Chad sometimes forgets how terrifying Taylor is, but never for long.

“Of course,” he tells her.

He considers telling her more, telling her that he’s scared, that he doesn’t want to mess things up with Ryan, that he doesn’t know what’s going on and where the two of them are, but he isn’t sure how much of that he should share. It feels like something he needs to sort out on his own. Still, knowing that she’s on his side makes him feel stronger, and better about the strange pit of uncertainty he’s currently residing in.

He thanks her again, and they both say bye. He begins to drive back home again, turning on the radio, tuning into the TOP 40 channel. He doesn’t recognize a lot of these songs, but he bets Ryan will.

 _Ryan._ He feels some amount of worry, still, the gut feeling that he’s messed up, that he’s hurt Ryan in some inexplicable way. Still, Chad thinks. It’s fixable. He just needs to talk to Ryan. Things _will_ fall into place.

-

His good cheer lasts for a while longer, and then Sharpay calls him on the phone, clearly angry, and now he knows that he’s messed up in a big way; a bigger way than he’d realised, even.

He isn’t really scared of Sharpay – ever since Ryan explained why she acts the way she does, he understands her motives, at least a little.

“ _She’s just career-focused, sometimes a bit too much. An actor’s success depends on their popularity; why do you think she cares about popularity? That’s why_ ,” Ryan had said once, when the topic of his sister had come up. “ _I’m not excusing the damage or harm she’s caused, I know she’s hurt people. But if you’re trying to understand why she acts the way she does, that’s the secret to it_.”

So, Chad isn’t scared of Sharpay. He’s worried about what she has to say to him, and how exactly this involves Ryan. He shifts at the table, waiting for her to arrive, while his parents sit across him, watching him. It’s the same feeling as waiting in the hall to meet the principal. The tension is heavy enough that his parents have picked up on it.

“We’re not upset with you, dear,” Chad’s mother says softly. “However, you know the rules, if you want a friend over you need to tell us in advance. Is something wrong?”

Chad’s father’s watching him thoughtfully.

“I don’t know,” he says. “She’s Ryan’s sister, and we’re not really on the best terms. For her to rush here like this, it must be really important.”

Chad’s parents exchange a glance.

“You know, Chad,” his father says, “if there’s something going on between you and Ryan…”

“Huh?” Chad says, trying not to let the panic show on his face.

“You can talk to us about it,” his father says, and his mother nods, and they’re both looking at him warmly, like it’s not as big a deal as it feels, like they’ll love him no matter what.

“I’m not sure what’s happening,” Chad says, “but I’ll let you know the moment that I do.”

He is saved from further conversation by the sound of a car revving up, parking at the front of their house. He hears the sound of high heels clicking against the pavement, and then the bell rings as if the person pressing it holds a grudge, which makes sense, given that it’s Sharpay.

He opens the door, and says, to his parents, “Mom, Dad…May I be excused?”

“I’m sorry, Mr Danforth, Mrs Danforth,” Sharpay says politely. “I only need to borrow him for around fifteen minutes.”

Chad’s parents exchange a look.

Chad’s mother makes a gesture with her hand. “Go ahead, take your time.”

Chad and Sharpay walk out, and Chad closes the door gently behind him. Sharpay walks over to her car, and sits on the bonnet, and Chad, who feels more comfortable standing, merely leans against the car door, watching her.

He wants to say _thank you for not outing me to my parents,_ but that’s too low a bar to set, even for her.

She gives him a furious look. “I cannot believe your nerve! How could you do that to Ryan!”

Chad exhales shakily, and then blinks. “Wait, what?”

He feels a little like he’s just been slapped.

“He kissed you, and you just pushed him away! Do you know how he feels? He’s miserable about it!”

Chad looks at Sharpay, really looks at her, and notes the sincerity in her tone, the genuineness to her anger, the fact that she clearly got there in a hurry, her hair falling out of its ponytail and one of her hairclips on crooked.

“I wanted to kiss Ryan,” Chad admits. “I didn’t push him away like that, Sharpay. I needed to talk to him first. The last thing I want to do, ever, is take advantage of your brother.”

He stares at her, serious. He’s sure the conviction in his tone speaks for itself.

“You _wanted_ to kiss Ryan?” Sharpay asks. “And what do you mean, take advantage of?”

“Sharpay,” Chad says solemnly, “I really like your brother, a lot. I didn’t want our first kiss to be ambiguous, or to be something he’d look back on and regret. I pulled away because I wanted to tell him all this clearly. I had it all figured out, I was going to tell him how much I liked him, but then he dismissed me, and I knew I’d fucked up.”

“Chad,” she says. “Ryan kissed you. _He_ initiated it. Did you think about that?”

“Yeah, but he’d just told me something personal and upsetting, and he was shaking, and trying not to cry, and,” Chad blinks, wondering how to word it. “I wasn’t sure what was going on through his head. I needed to know that, you know? If we aren’t on the same page about it, someone will get hurt.”

“Clearly,” Sharpay scoffs. “You both aren’t on the same page about this. Both of you are hurting. Ryan thinks you’re disgusted by him. We need to fix that.”

Chad looks at her, wide-eyed. “How? Should I call him, or?”

“Talk to him tomorrow in school, during break,” Sharpay says. “For now, text him.”

Chad pulls out his phone, looks at her. “What do I say? Sorry for freaking you out?”

“No!” Sharpay says. “That’ll just lead to more misunderstandings. Do _not_ apologize over text message, Danforth! That’s the first rule to like, everything. Keep it simple. Say hi, say you’re looking forward to seeing him at school tomorrow morning, maybe say thank you to him for trusting you, that’s all. Remind him through your words that you’re still his friend.”

Chad frowns, but he types out a message, and hits send. “Are you sure this will work?” he asks.

“Who is Ryan’s twin, me or you?” she asks. “Don’t worry, it’ll definitely work.”

Chad glances at the window of his house, and sees his parents there, watching him.

“I should probably get going,” he says. “Thank you for coming here, and telling me this.”

Sharpay nods at him conspiringly. “You better fix this,” she says, and then she gets into her car, and gives him a little wave.

Chad walks back in. It’s around ten, he thinks if Taylor’s still up he can maybe call her and talk to her about it, but he also knows Taylor, however supportive she is, isn’t his personal therapist, and besides, he doesn’t know where he’d even start, discussing the way he feels.

“Everything alright?” his dad asks as he walks over to his room.

“Not yet,” Chad admits. He meets his dad’s gaze. “But it will be.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the next chapter is the longest one, if i'm not mistaken. it's also the heaviest one, but rest assured, this is angst-with-a-happy-ending city.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw for discussion of homophobia (nothing super heavy, just what it means to be queer in a heteronormative world), and cishets being cishets (lots of heteronormativity, basically.)  
> there is also a mention of an eating disorder (but it's a very small mention & hopefully not super heavy.)
> 
> anyway this chapter is, in some ways, the heart of this fic. and i am very happy to finally be posting it!

The text from Chad makes Ryan think that maybe, just maybe, all hope is not lost. He sends back something standard, a little _looking forward to seeing you, too_ and leaves it at that, because anything more than that just feels needy. He dresses for school like he’s invincible, lavender pants with a sparkly magenta hat and a classic white shirt. He needs to look as _alright_ as possible. He cannot run the risk of looking as shattered ( _and heartbroken_ , a traitorous voice in Ryan’s head reminds him) as he feels.

He shuffles into homeroom with not a minute to spare, and he can tell that Chad’s looking at him with a quiet intensity. He meets Chad’s gaze, and mouths _later_. Chad’s subtle nod tells him that his message has been received. Ryan’s goal is to get himself some time with Chad during lunch, to apologize for his temporary misstep, ask him if things can continue, same as they’ve been.

This plan is derailed by Mrs Darbus’s latest discussion topic. She wants them to write a script as a class, and she wants to test their range, asks them to think outside of the box and find innovative ways to describe conflict, and because Ryan’s life is never easy or even mildly comfortable, Troy Bolton of all people raises a hand and says that they should do a play with a gay protagonist. Gay rights, and all that.

Ryan’s hyperaware of how everyone’s either staring at him, or ignoring him. He feels like a spotlight’s been shot right at him, but this time, he doesn’t want the attention. He sees, from the corner of his eye, that Chad is fidgeting and Taylor is looking at Chad with a concerned look. Huh.

Gabriella chimes in, as she always does, because that’s Troy and Gabi for you, and she’s excited about it, “It’ll be so original!” she says, and she probably means well, but it sets Ryan’s teeth on edge. And then Troy is building off on that, talking about gay people like they’re hypothetical, and Ryan feels like his body is a line taut with tension, ready to snap, like he’s simmering with rage. He’s aware of the way Sharpay’s looking at him, concerned; he knows she would put an arm around him if that wouldn’t just give him more unwanted attention. He’s also aware of the way Chad is looking at Troy, with an expression that seems mildly exasperated or strongly exhausted, and it’s just too much for Ryan, the way that queer kids are always, _always_ an afterthought, and Ryan can’t stand it anymore. Without even thinking, he stands up, hands gripping the edge of his desk.

“Hey, here’s a thought,” he says, bitterly but firmly, “Maybe you should ask the only queer kid in class what he thinks before you go ahead and try to tell a story that you don’t understand?”

He’s aware, suddenly, of Chad standing up. “Not the only queer kid,” he says to Ryan, and to the rest of the class, but he’s looking at Ryan, and his voice is gentle as he says it.

Oh god. If Ryan were the swooning type, he would swoon. As it is, it’s all he can do not to scream very loudly, because trust life to pitch him a curveball.

Chad’s talking now, a whole speech, and Chad is _good_ at motivational speeches, good enough that Ryan thinks he could’ve been team captain. But maybe Ryan is biased, because he really does like Chad.

“With all due respect, none of you get it,” Chad is saying. “You think you do but you don’t know what it’s like. This isn’t like Zeke and baking, this is scarier, this extends beyond cliques and high school. Maybe one day I’ll start a family with a man, and I don’t know what that’ll mean for me. I have to fear how my family will react, what my grandparents will say. I have to worry about how many friends will stop being my friends over this. There’s so much that you take for granted, so much that you can’t conceptualise. Liking men is empowering, sure, but it’s also scary. It’s very scary. And, you know, if you want to do a play on that, kudos to you, but maybe ask people who know what it’s like, instead of just assuming? Troy and Gabriella, I know that things weren’t easy for you, getting together, I know this mostly because Taylor and I tried to break you up, for which we’re very sorry.” He shoots a smile at his ex-girlfriend, and Ryan can’t help but smile a little, as well. Trust Chad to bring levity into something so heavy. “But still, it’s not the same. You both can get married, out of high school, the moment you’re legally old enough to. I can’t do that. It’s not even legal for me to have a husband. The way that homophobia is ingrained, societally, is just, really, a lot. It’s not something you can think about just to give your script some character and then never think about again. That’s just disrespectful on many levels.”

Chad nods at the class, and at Mrs Darbus. Then, with everyone’s eyes on him, he walks over to Ryan, takes his arm, and pulls him towards the door. He looks at Mrs Darbus. “If you’ll excuse us?”

She nods, the expression on her face looking like she’s trying to hold back a smile. “Meet me at the end of the day, Danforth, Evans.”

Chad looks at Ryan, as if non-verbally asking whether Ryan’s okay with that, and Ryan nods slightly, and they march out of the class together, as one.

-

Chad leads Ryan to a corridor nobody even uses, the one that everyone knows leads to a room that’s used for storage, and they both walk all the way over to the dead end and sit there, leaning against the wall. Ryan isn’t sure what they are to each other anymore, or what they’re doing, but he feels shaken up by things to an extent that he isn’t sure where to begin, or how to ask.

“You just dragged us out of class together,” Ryan says, because it feels safe to start with something like that, something that is pure fact.

“Yeah,” Chad says sheepishly. “I’m sure Sharpay will get your books and stuff, don’t worry. Taylor will probably take care of mine. We really just fled, huh.”

Ryan laughs without really meaning to. “You’re a ridiculous person.”

“Believe it or not, you’re not the first person to tell me that,” Chad says, and they both sit there, silently, for a moment.

There’s something Ryan wants to ask, but he isn’t sure how to frame it right, how to talk to Chad about sexuality without being weird about it. Chad’s never mentioned it before, after all, and Ryan knows that Chad isn’t under any obligation to come out, and he doesn’t want to pressure him, but a tiny part of him wonders why Chad didn’t come to him; wonders whether he hadn’t been a safe enough person to have this conversation with.

“Hey,” Chad says, knocking his shoulder against Ryan’s. “You alright?”

“Mmhm,” Ryan says. And then, “Nice speech.”

Chad smiles, but he isn’t looking at Ryan. He isn’t looking at anything. “Thanks, bro.”

“Are _you_ alright?” Ryan asks carefully.

“I don’t know,” Chad says. “I didn’t really think I’d come out like that.”

“I’m sorry,” Ryan says, shifting so that their shoulders are pressed against each other.

“I’m not,” Chad says, and he looks at Ryan, carefully. “It’s not what I envisioned, sure. But it’s still something I’m sure about, and I think it’s important to stand up and voice these things, whenever we can.”

Ryan swallows. “If you don’t mind my asking,” he says, carefully, “how long have you known?”

Chad shrugs, but gives Ryan a little smile. “I’m still figuring this out,” he tells him. “Right now I’m only really sure that I like men. I’m not sure if my crush on Taylor was like, a gay man version of comp het and I’m just gay, or if I’m bisexual with a heavy lean towards men specifically, and I don’t see myself finding out the answer to that particularly soon. This stuff is a journey, right?”

“Right,” Ryan says with a little nod, waiting for Chad to go on.

“So, yeah, I definitely like men,” Chad tells him. “I might also like women, I might not. I don’t know yet.”

Ryan smiles, and lets his head rest against Chad’s shoulder.

“You know, you helped in a big way,” Chad tells him.

“I did?” Ryan asks.

“Mm,” Chad says. “Your being out, your being unapologetic about who you are, even when it’s scary… that made me feel like, I don’t know, like, it’s not the end of the world, liking men. That despite how overwhelming it all feels, it’s survivable. You know what I mean?”

“I know exactly what you mean,” Ryan says softly. “I’m glad I could help. But, er. This isn’t about… what happened yesterday, is it? Because I’ve been feeling awful about that, honestly.”

“Don’t,” Chad says. “Don’t feel bad about it. I’m glad you kissed me.”

“Oh?” Ryan asks. “It felt like you couldn’t get away fast enough.”

Chad’s arm wraps around Ryan’s shoulder, and Ryan sighs, waiting.

“That was a misunderstanding,” Chad says. “I wanted us to talk before we did anything else, because honestly? I really like you. I don’t want ambiguity. If this is something you want, I’d like us to be boyfriends for real.”

“There’s nothing I would like more,” Ryan says, honestly, and then looks at Chad before looking away. “But are you sure that you want this – want _me_?”

“Absolutely,” Chad says. “Entirely, fully and completely.”

“It might not be as easy as you’re expecting,” Ryan says. “Chad, there’s just, a lot of stuff I’m learning to deal with. My mental health isn’t the best, and….” He stops, uncertain how to explain the disordered eating, or whether he even needs to. He is seeing a specialist, after all, and he’s gotten much better; better enough that he doesn’t really need to talk about it. He still doesn’t have the most normal relationship with food, but he manages fine.

It isn’t going to be a problem unless he relapses, and Ryan is determined to ensure that doesn’t happen. He’s also not naïve enough to ignore the fact that it _is_ a possibility. 

“I still want to be with you, even if it gets difficult,” Chad says, the look in his eyes gentle in a way that assures Ryan that if he does tell Chad, Chad will support him and respect him, same as ever. “The only thing that matters to me is, do you want to be with me?”

“Yes,” Ryan says, and he smiles. “I really, _really_ do.”

And then he breaks his own _no kissing boys on school campus_ rule, the rule he never thought he’d break, but it’s fine. Nobody else comes to this corridor, anyway, and he’s with Chad. He’s safe here.

Chad’s smiling into the kiss as he kisses back. They break away after some time, but both of them are grinning.

“Well, what now?” Ryan asks.

“I don’t know about you,” Chad says, “but I don’t want to go to any of my classes this afternoon, and I think my attendance can take it.”

“Cheers, and well, ditto,” Ryan says. “So we just hang out here, until the last bell goes and then we meet Darbus?”

Chad nods. His phone pings, and Ryan watches as he pulls it out and checks.

“Taylor’s staging an intervention with Troy,” he says.

“I’m sure he’ll, you know, be okay with it,” Ryan offers. “You’re like a brother to him, after all.”

Chad smiles. “Yeah, you’re on the money with that,” he says, showing Ryan his phone, where Troy’s sent a message that says something about “ _love n support u im sorry if i ever made u doubt that_ ” that goes on into a little essay. It’s heartfelt and sincere and sweet, and it’s clear that Chad isn’t losing his team over this, which is important. Ryan feels a little lighter inside.

“I’m going to tell Taylor that you’re my boyfriend,” Chad tells Ryan, grinning as he says the word boyfriend. It’s adorable, and Ryan would make fun of Chad over it, except he feels the same way.

“I should tell Shar,” he says, and gets his phone out. He’s beaming too, and he feels like he could walk on air, with how light and buoyant he is.

Once that is done, Ryan pulls his earphones out of his bag. “Want to listen to my baseball playlist?” he asks.

“You have a baseball playlist?” Chad asks, making a gesture with his hand that is the universal symbol for _give it to me._

“Of course,” Ryan says, smiling. “What do you take me for?”

They sit together and listen, sharing Ryan’s earphones, leaning against each other. Most of the day goes like that; in their own little baseball showtune world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they are BOYFRIENDS now!!
> 
> might just post the final chapter tomorrow!


	10. Chapter 10

The moment the last bell goes, Chad and Ryan walk over to Mrs Darbus’s office. She is there, waiting for them, as expected. They expect to be berated for missing class, and are ready for it, solemn expressions on their faces and all. What they do not expect is her telling them that she’s written out a note that excuses them for the rest of their classes and ensures that they will get attendance, and that she’s glad that they spoke up.

“In fact,” she says, “I know this may be a sensitive topic, so I will not push it. But if the two of you would want to write a script together, about the challenges faced by a queer teenager in high school? I would very much like to read it.”

Ryan and Chad look at each other. “We can Sikenize it,” Chad says softly.

Ryan smiles, and says to her, “Yeah, I’m in if he is,” and Chad says, “Let’s go, then.”

-

They’re both grinning as they leave her office.

“So,” Chad tells Ryan, “I kinda actually don’t want today to end, at all.”

Ryan raises an eyebrow, probably sceptical about the weird sentence structure, but then nods. “Me neither. Do you want to come over for a sleepover, or have me come over there, or?”

“I’ll ask my parents,” Chad says, and he looks delighted, like his birthday’s come early. “We’ll figure something out.”

“Don’t you have a curfew or something?” Ryan asks. “I know they prefer it when you tell them things in advance.”

“Well, it’s a special occasion,” Chad says, nudging Ryan’s shoulder with his. “I think they’ll make an exception, just this once.”

They’ve almost reached the parking lot, when they’re approached by Troy, who without any warning whatsoever, enfolds Chad in a hug.

“Whoa, hey,” Chad says, muffled by the sentient blanket that is Troy Bolton and his athletic arms. “Thanks, dude. You’re still my best bro.”

“I better be!” Troy says, letting go of Chad. He seems to process Ryan standing there only then. “Are you Chad’s boyfriend? I’m sorry I thought you wanted to get with Gabi, that must’ve been truly awkward.”

“It certainly was a strange time, yeah,” Ryan says. “And yes, I am Chad’s boyfriend.”

“Hm, no wonder he kept blowing me off to hang with you,” Troy says. “I get it, now.”

Ryan and Chad exchange a look, uncertain on whether or not to correct Troy on how long they’ve been dating. They don’t really get much of a chance to do anything either way, because Troy pats Ryan on the shoulder enthusiastically, and says to Chad, “We’re letting you off practice today, because the stuff that happened in homeroom seemed like a lot, but if your ass isn’t on the court tomorrow, this friendship is _over._ ”

Chad rolls his eyes. “What team?” he yells in the direction that Troy ran off.

A faint “WILDCATS” is audible.

“He’s weird,” Ryan says.

“Yeah, he really is,” Chad agrees.

-

They walk over to Sharpay’s car, where she’s waiting for Ryan. She smiles when she sees them, but does a great job at ensuring that it looks like a scowl.

“I still can’t believe that Troy thought we were dating for months,” Ryan says to Chad, smiling.

Chad beams back. “I guess we always did act boyfriendly, even when we were just friends.”

“Boyfriendly?” Ryan echoes, clearly amused.

“Shut up, Evans,” Chad shoots back. “It works.”

“No, no, it’s just,” Ryan gestures vaguely with his hands, trying to explain. “I’ve used that word, too.”

They both smile at each other.

“I’m not sure why it’s not a word, you know?” Chad says. “If friendly is a word, and boyfriend is a word, then – ”

He’s interrupted by a timely honk from Sharpay’s car horn, and her yelling, “RYAN, talk to him LATER, we have to GO!” which checks out. Honestly, it’s surprising she gave them as much time as she did.

“Okay, okay, Sis!” Ryan yells back.

Ryan leans into Chad’s space, puts a hand on the front of his shirt, pulls him forward into a quick kiss, suddenly not giving a single damn about who sees them.

“I will see you later,” Ryan says, and he’s grinning, and he feels better than he did when he won the Star Dazzle award, even.

“You _will_ see me later,” Chad says. He walks Ryan over to Sharpay’s car, and kisses him again, much to Sharpay’s annoyance. “You’ll be hard pressed to get rid of me. I am going to be a limpet, and you’re going to be my rock.”

“Enough already!” Sharpay yells, but she doesn’t look or sound angry. Chad suspects what Ryan knows – she’s just keeping up appearances.

Ryan’s about to climb into the car, but right before he does, he pulls off his hat, and puts it on top of Chad’s head unceremoniously, pulling it down over his curls. “Here.”

Chad smiles, and pulls off _his_ Wildcats jacket (he’s wearing a tank top underneath, and Ryan’s eyes widen), tossing it to Ryan. “Bye!”

Sharpay starts up her car, begins to drive away. Chad can hear her, and she’s saying something that sounds like, “Seriously Ry, could you both be _more_ of a cliché?”

He smiles to himself, adjusts the hat on his head.

In Sharpay’s car, snug in Chad’s Wildcats jacket, Ryan smiles to himself, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> & that's it!!! we are officially done! thank you @ everyone who stuck with this thing while it hovered in WIP uncertainty land - it's been great writing this and sharing it with you all!! 
> 
> ~~later on, chad gets t-shirts printed that say BOYFRIENDLY on them, and ryan laughs at him, but he cherishes his t-shirt anyway.~~


End file.
